It’s my first Valentine’s Day as a wife and I had planned nothing! I’ve been a procrastinator this year on celebrations, but I have a good excuse (more details to come later). Tony and I agreed to not buy presents and not to eat out this year for V-Day because we don’t want to contribute to this consumerism holiday. At least that’s the excuse we came up with, but frankly we’re just lazy and cheap. I’m surprised that Tony agreed to this because I could just flip the switch and say that I wanted flowers and chocolate.
It’s been an interesting period in our lives, with being newly married and learning to live with each other. I’ve never had a roommate (Janelle, you so easy to live with, it was like I was living by myself), so I didn’t know how to deal with roommate problems. Growing up as an only child, I also didn’t really learn to share my space. So the combination of those two made it hard for me to figure little roommate things out with Tony. After struggling to understand why he didn’t hang his coats after getting home and why he left dishes in the sink, I was imparted marriage wisdom from Tony’s cousin. She pointed out to me that my definition of “clean” isn’t Tony’s. *Ding* *Ding* *Ding* That was when I realized I have been selfish this whole time. I’ve been holding Tony to my standards and not looking at things from his perspective. No marriage is perfect and I shouldn’t expect mine to be. If Tony did everything exactly the way I would, then I would be marrying myself.
So just because we aren’t doing all the typical V-Day things, it doesn’t mean we aren’t celebrating love. Whatever we end up doing tonight (likely eat dinner, ice-cream, then watch the Olympics), we will be celebrating our imperfect marriage. It’s the imperfection that makes us grow in faith, hope and love.
It’s been awhile since I’ve written on here. A lot has happened since I last wrote, but I’ll slowly reveal them later. I wanted to tribute this post to Tony’s grandma who left us peacefully almost two months ago. I met her two years ago when I started dating Tony. The first thing I noticed about her was how stylish she was. She left me all her statement jewelries and I wore a piece a day for 30 days to remember her. Photos can be found on my Instagram.
A year ago yesterday (Jul 2), Tony asked me to marry him. Actually, he didn’t ask out loud, instead he just held the ring in a box and waited for me to nod. If you read our wedding website, you probably already know how we met (friends and OK Cupid) and where he proposed to me (Victoria BC). So I thought it would be fun to share some photos from our 8 months of engagement.
Our engagement period wasn’t as crazy as some say it would. I pretty much planned 80% of our wedding within a month. I was very lucky to find my perfect dress (perfect in look and price) at the third wedding dress shop I visited (third time’s a charm). We visited about 4 venues, some in Snohomish (too far) and some in Seattle (too hard to find parking). We started our venue hunting without a guest number so we were falling in love with cute barns/farms that could only fit 150 people. When we were putting our guest list together, we realized that it would be around 300 people. Quickly, my rustic wedding idea vanished. With that kind of number, only a few hotels can accommodate it. Since I’m in downtown Seattle Monday to Friday, I really didn’t want to come here again on the weekend for my special day. I live and work in the concrete jungle, so I wanted something outdoorsy. As we were doing research, Newcastle Golf Club came up. I browsed the website to see what kind of pricing and options there are…and of course it was out of our budget! I had been to the Golf Club previously for brunch and dinner. I always knew that place was beautiful and their wedding photos looked amazing. For a couple weeks, Tony and I didn’t think about Newcastle and kept visiting other golf clubs. We started getting questions from the family on what our wedding date is and I knew we couldn’t plan anything if we don’t have a venue. So finally, I got a little frustrated and scheduled a visit to Newcastle. I was hesitant to see it because I knew I would love it and then I would let my emotions take over and pay a hefty price for the venue. Tony and I visited Newcastle on a Thursday and we booked it on that Friday. For those of you who know me, I did negotiate a better price. In fact, I negotiated every aspect of my wedding. With 300 guests, every penny counts.
Since 80% of the wedding planned, I decided that I could take a break from wedding planning. So I took a really long break (Sept – Dec). Of course that also meant I took a break from every aspect of wedding planning including the “wedding diet”. When 2017 rolled around, it was time to kick into wedding planning gear (minus the diet part). Pretty much from January to March, I did almost nothing (maybe 5%). When Spring came along, Tony and I went into panic mode. That was also when family started giving their input on what they want to see at the wedding. With last minute program printing and seat charting, Tony and I only yelled at each ONCE. Wedding planning was a lot of fun for me. My besties and I spent a lot of time talking and doing girly things. Tony and I spent a lot of time learning how to work with each other under stress. We even learned a new skill (waltz – thanks Lisa).
The wedding day was perfect! We went into it knowing that something would go wrong (slideshow didn’t work, accidents, not enough time for pictures, etc.). I couldn’t ask for a better day. I got to celebrate with my friends and family. People had a great time taking pictures, eating and dancing. AND most importantly, at the end of the day I got to go home with my groom!
It’s been exactly a month since I said “I do” to Tony. People have been asking me if married life feels different or if it has been an adjustment. I always felt bad answer, “no.” I started thinking why is it that I don’t feel different now that I’m Tony’s wife…Is there something missing in our relationship…Did we fall out of the honeymoon stage that fast… But slowly I’m realizing that I don’t feel that different (other than not living with my parents anymore) because Tony and I never treated each other differently because of our relationship status. We dated for marriage, and we married for life-long partnership. I’m sure the pet peeves will surface as we tread through year 1.
Back to the original purpose of this post. Honeymoon/Family-moon in Hawaii was a lot of fun and too short. We ate well and played hard. We had a lot of our firsts (now keep your mind straight). We went parasailing and snorkeling. Ate a lot of poke and acai bowls. Drank way too much coffee. Forgot to reapply sunscreen. Overall it was a relaxing trip just the way we planned it. Enjoy this video of our trip!
Got these photo booth pictures on our Honeymoon, but didn’t get to look through them until now. I’m so glad that we requested Alex from Fotographia to add a second photo booth outside. As the wedding day was approaching, I was excited about the 80 degrees weather we were going to get. It’s Seattle, so it always rains on Memorial Day weekend. We were blessed by God to have the hottest Memorial Day weekend in 20 years! So when I knew that we would have a gorgeous day on that beautiful golf course, I knew people would be taking tons of pictures of the view. Let’s be real…it’s an Asian wedding. Selfie selfie selfie! The last minute photo booth captured the stunning view and our guests were able to take a copy of the pictures home with them. Since the wedding day for the Bride and Groom is a completely different experience from the guests, we had no idea if any of the details we planned meant anything to anyone. From the pictures I got, it looked like the last minute add-on and the extra money for the photo booth was well worth it. Look through the PHOTOS and find yours…